Don't test my patients..

I just returned from an X-Ray exam of my knees. Nothing serious, it’s just an annoying pain that bothers me when I sit still for a long time, which I am doing a lot of, these days. Since it has been irritating me for the last 3 months or so, I decided to consult a Bone specialist, last week.

The medical centre I chose for the task was picked more out of convenience (its right next door), rather than for its state-of-the-art capacities. One niggle in my plan, however, was the fact that this centre had no X-Ray machine, which is apparently needed to reach a conclusion. I was told I’d be called when it arrived.

Nearly (or merely) after a week of waiting (that's how long/short it takes in Dubai to get an X Ray machine and license it to the centre), I got a call from the centre, asking me to come for my X-ray appointment today. As I entered, I noticed something strange. There were more nurses than doctors, and these were the meddlesome type, who keep interrupting the doctors in the middle of their diagnoses, with unimportant matters such as the spelling of ‘medicine’, and concern over his illegible scribbling. I winced at their sheer numbers, as I handed them back my A4 form, with my details, before my X-Ray examination. We all know the clichéd saying that goes:Too many nurses soil the cloth, or something.

Anyways, soon after the X-ray exam, the doctor called me into his office, and was tossing around some small talk while inspecting my X-rays (What is the relation between my increased fatness, lack of physical exercise and my knee pain?), when a couple of nurses literally stormed into the room with the A4 form I had given them before, and stood by the doctor, wearing grim expressions on their faces,and asked him “What should we fill here?” To which he replied, rather calmly, “Arthritis in both knees”.

My first reaction, obviously, was :O! But before I could express that out aloud, or even wonder whether I’ve been IMing too much, I noticed the name on the top of the form. It was some other bloke's A4 form. An unfunny scare, thanks to some unprofessional nurses.

P.S. My prognosis was that I need to stop sitting on the couch all day and get some exercise.

Public (Speaking) Relations

There's something about Public speaking that always gets to me. It's probably my innately introverted nature or something, but when I do get up on stage, and my friends can vouch for me here, I end up shaking, forgetting and at times changing my whole speech. I have shied away from all such forums where one is expected to deliver his opinion via the verbal medium to convince a whole bunch of people in the room. I can pretty easily talk to new people in general, it is only when it is made into a formal ceremony of sorts that it makes me nervous.

One time this happened was when I participated in an Intra college essay writing competition in NIT Trichy, based on the topic “Technical Education in India”. I did quite some research on the topic and produced a pretty decent essay and went on to win the first prize. I was called to the ceremony where they said they would distribute the prizes. When I reached the place I was told, to prepare a short speech on the same topic and present it on stage. Oh! Cock. I tried, in vain, to recollect my points. You see, I had written the article more than two months ago and I couldn’t seem to remember even a single fact that could add weight to my speech to impress the statistic crazy audience. (On an unrelated note, did you know that 23% of this article was thought up of in the loo?) My cue card with the words “India” and “Education” scribbled in Bold and an encircled ”Improvement” , with an arrow pointing to ‘system’ didn’t render much help either. What followed was 5 whole minutes of unprepared hoo-hah.

Somehow, when one speaks extempore, ones words flow in rhythm , lucidly and gently cascading towards that final statement or conclusion one wants to help the audience reach . My speech was nothing like that. Rather unintentionally, my initial fear (I could feel my legs shaking behind the podium) took the form of downright offensiveness as I launched into a harangue about how flawed the educational system is, and how the West seems to have an unassailable lead over us and so on. Worryingly, none of this was on the actual essay , which had been a mild mannered piece on how our system, although lagging on several fronts, could be tweaked for better results! After about 3 minutes of high energy dissing, I noticed a couple of my professors in the audience, looking at me with judging eyes (NAG for one). Unable to really recollect if I had taken a swipe at professors in the last few minutes of blurriness, I decided to end my speech with a whimper by thanking the audience for their time and got my ass off stage.

All in all, I have established that my Public Speaking abilities are crappy and that I need to improve. In graduate school, I am sure this is a pretty critical asset given the number of presentations and seminars I may have to deliver. Has anyone got any ideas on how to go about it? I could really use some short term solutions, because I am quite free (read jobless) for the next month or so and I can work on it during this period.

Inception

Inertia. . It’s the reason an object continues in its state of motion unless it is acted upon by an unbalanced force. The same reason one continues doing the same things over and over, without much thought or effort. Inertia is not always bad; it would be a pain in the ass if I couldn’t auto-pilot my way through the routine things in life like brushing, eating and typing. I don’t want to learn to walk every time I need to get across the room. But in many aspects of life, I'd be better off without it.

For the last few weeks, I’ve been having a nagging thought at the back of mind to start blogging. And I’ve been ignoring it quite well. I’ve managed to convince myself that I’m better off not blogging. Who’d want to read my thoughts, seriously? Isn’t the internet already full of blokes who shove their opinions on others regardless of whether they care or not? I also kept reminding myself of two earlier misguided and flopped attempts at Blogging, both of which were as reader friendly as an Open Source Software’s User Manual. And I had almost succeeded at not blogging, till I read this book by Marshall Goldsmith, which had a line on Inertia that got me writing away. The line can be paraphrased as: Whatever you are doing right now, you are pretty likely to be doing the same thing at a given instant from now.

Not sure how well it applies to you but it is pretty accurate in my case. If I am surfing the channels on the tube looking for something to watch, I’ll be surfing five minutes from now. If I’m engaged in making up excuses for not writing, I will continue doing so for days, months, even years from now. So screw it. I am here. And I am going to blog. I am not going to let something Newton coined when he was drunk to get the better of me.

I am not a people’s writer; I have earned tags such as ridiculous, nonsensical and pointless. But I have also been told my writing stinks. I am writing this blog for these people because they believe in me and my sense of writing about nothing in particular. Stay tuned.